Hey there Mama of 2, I know you’re thinking of 3 and I wanted to help. You see there’s loads I’ve learnt this last year and I think it may help….a little.
I’ve started to hibernate in my little world, get anxiety when I have to get all of us out of the house. I’ve no time to make my house look nice and to be frank I could take out shares in chicken dippers and those little cut apple packs.
Your house won’t look nice for a while but it will be full of laughter and tears.
You may not cook gourmet food for a while but if everyone is fed and dressed you’re a winner.
It’s been tough with 2 toddlers around, maybe it’s my age or my fraying patience too. Where 1 boy climbs the other laughs, where 1 boy cries the other tag teams. Sleep is a premium and I write this after 3 hours of totally broken sleep. I’m a little bit broken now.
You will feel mentally and physically exhausted. Ramp it up moving from 2 to 3.
My body and mind may be broken. But these things can all be fixed. Post natal depression has not beat me but is starting to meet its match – my confidence is starting to bloom. You see that first year of 3 was the hardest challenge I’ve ever had but I did it. We did it.
You may find that friendships change or dwindle completely. Those that aren’t in the baby years anymore have their own school run life which is far away from nappies and spit up. It’s ok it’s no ones fault, life and the world changes. You’ll (eventually) meet new people, new friends.
Make sure you take every friendship hand that’s given. You’ll need them all to keep you strong.
Parenting is about love and when you feel broken it’s even more important to revisit your self care and even make the most strategic Schedule to put that in. You need to remember to love yourself too.
My heart is so full I can’t contain it. This level of love is completely overwhelming. Yes I had it with each child’s birth and early years but when you get 3 to play nicely and they give independent cuddles and kisses to each other rather than snatch and pull hair. Your heart is not ready for that. It bursts open. There are way more happy tears then I ever thought possible. You’ll already have this with two but when you haven’t got enough hands to separate them all, well that’s a whole new level of appreciation!
So Mama of 2 – can you handle a 3rd?
The thing they don’t tell you is you can and you will when or if you decide to. Because regardless of when and if it happens – You’ve done this twice, you know the score.
Just be prepared to lose the rest of your heart all over again, because when you know there’s space you always have that yearning need to fill it.